Guest Post: The Reality of Mental Illness “They Say” by Allen Minor

Warning: This could be triggering

 allen2Check out this poem on Youtube

They say… -They say that everyday above ground is a good day.
They say when life gives you lemons you’ve gotta make lemonade.
They say that when things don’t turn out the right way
That’s okay because tomorrow is always a new day,
Ya know, they say a lot of things about how I should feel, -But let’s get real,
They don’t know me
They are not me
They don’t have to force themselves out of bed every morning and stumble to the mirror and see me.
And I’m not talking about the me that they’d see
If they were standing next to me
As I shied away from my reflection,
I’m talking about the REAL me.
The secret me that I keep hidden behind lock and key -Because I know that if they ever saw it -Even THEY’D say that those lemons are too spoiled,
And even water and sugar can’t help THAT medicine go down. -And I’m not talking about the Depakote, Wellbutrin, or Xanax getting caught in your throat,
To quote Alanis Morissette, I’m talking about the jagged little pill that they call truth
Getting stuck because it’s too hard to swallow. ….
De Cartes said, “I think, therefore I am.” -He said that the only thing that I can be sure of is that I exist,
Beyond this, everything else is a question.
Nowhere is this proven more true
Than in those with mental health issues.
You can give me all your quotes, proverbs, and platitudes,
But the fact is that for me
Tomorrow is not a new day.
It may be true for you,
But obviously my truth is different than yours,
Because when I lie in bed the night before
I don’t think about tomorrow. -I think about today,
What I could’ve, should’ve, would’ve done better than I did yesterday,
And I can’t stop the relay race of thoughts in my mind
As they reach back in time -Struggling to find -Every single thing that I’ve ever done wrong,
So it can take it from yesterday and pass it off to today -And remind me that tomorrow is not a new day,
It’s just a new way of getting it wrong. ….
They say… -They say that they can’t understand how anyone could be so selfish as to take their own life. 
Well I say -I don’t understand how anyone can be so blind as to see someone set on fire everyday -And not understand why they might want to put out the flames.
I say… -I say that I can’t understand how anyone could be so selfish as to want someone to burn -Just so they don’t have to feel guilty or question anything.
And I’m not saying that suicide is the right way,
And I’m not saying that’s how I want to end things, -But that’s what mental illness is.
“I think, therefore I am,” -“I think, therefore I am,” -“I think, therefore I am,” -And when I am in pain seemingly every single day -It makes sense that eventually all I’m going to think about is how to make that go away. -It makes sense that if all I can think about is the pain of yesterday,
Then tomorrow is not really a new day, -Because that means that today is just remembering or anticipating the same old pain in new ways. …. -Fear of judgement is the number one reason that those with mental health issues do not seek help. -They say that society is getting better with that.
Suicide is the 8th leading cause of death in the US. -They say that society is getting better with that. -Along with millions of other people, I suffer from mental health issues. -They say that we’ll get better with that. -They say that tomorrow is new day. -They say… -They say…a lot of things.
But now it’s time for them to understand.
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About Michelle Clark Bipolar Bandit

I am a strong advocate for the mentally ill and have been since I was first approached by a lawyer in a psychiatric facility as a teenager. He wanted me to help him fight how the mentally ill are mistreated. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of 17 after a full blown manic episode. Before that, I suffered from debilitating depression for 4 years. My goals are to help others by sharing my story and providing tips to deal with mania and depression. I often write blogs related to advocating for people like myself. I want to encourage, inspire, and educate those with #bipolar disorder and other mental illnesses and also include inspirational #quotes. I founded the group Advocates for People with Mental Illnesses and the page Mental Health Advocates United and have several social media sites that are related to bipolar disorder and/or advocacy. If you are an advocate or would like to be, I hope you join our FB group: Advocates for People with Mental Illnesses
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3 Responses to Guest Post: The Reality of Mental Illness “They Say” by Allen Minor

  1. Judy Welch says:

    My bi-polar is obvious and constant….my family , all of them think I’m just crazy, do drugs for pleasure ,unstable, the odd duck in my family……if I could sleep everyday I am pretty sure I would be more” normal” …if I take my meds to sleep everyday …they do not work…I get used to them quickly I take them accordingly …sleep deprived ..crazier the longer you stay awake …I do have physical pain as well: my neck and back have had 2 surgeries each…maybe looking at another neck surgery , I go to my surgeon this month..I will be 50 at the end of the month..YAY!!!! Truly I never thought at any earlier year, especially at 20-40 years ago..haha…the joke is on me!!! My children are grown and married and I have 2 beautiful grandsons as well…I have Ben living alone for 5+years …that’s cool …really it is…but I hate being judged by people that should know me but don’t…they just let me in on certain information, because I am not afraid to voice my feelings at anyplace ,anytime ,for whatever misinformed info they heard, or pit me against someone, because they know I will say or do something…so it SUCKS….I Wish They Could Be In My Head For 5 Minutes…..there would be no more judgement from them…I talk to strangers that share a common thread online..hahaha…that is most of my social life….I do visit a friend that’s been ill for 3 years….kids if they Need me for something…hahaha…friends hardly ever visit, and it seems they all come at once…then maybe in 2-3 weeks they do it again…I am not sure what to do to change anything and that is my PROBLEM…I don’t give a damn what people think or say…..very open minded…..BUT IF YOUR OWN FAMILY……Treats you like worse than a stranger…..parents DO NOT !!!…LOVE ME…and I have always known it !!!……..What is wrong with a person, or I should say child ,that your own parents care or love everyone besides ME……true story

  2. Kate says:

    Yes. Exactly! Beautifully written xx

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